Removing My Walls of Resistance
“I’m so ashamed.”
“I’m not enough.”
“I’m not worthy.”
“I’m an idiot.”
“I’m not strong enough.”
“What’s the point.”
“Nobody understands me.”
These are some of the damaging beliefs many of us hold on to as women: our Wall of Resistance.
They are the reason why we so often tell ourselves ’No’. They are the voice inside that prevents us from wanting, deserving, connecting. We are enslaved to the dangerous illusion of these beliefs until we tell ourselves ‘Enough.’
I am guilty of holding limiting beliefs. My beliefs took root in me when I was six years old, and they came into my consciousness in my early 20s after the death of one of my closest friends. In my state of grief I became aware that my inner child, wounded and frightened, was trapped inside towering walls of damaging beliefs. These walls caused me so much pain and disconnection and yet somehow there was a comfort in their familiarity. While there was a longing inside of me to let go of my wounded child and my false beliefs, I was frightened by what might lie beyond the walls that had kept me prisoner and yet so safe for so many years.
One night, overwhelmed by my own pain and suffering, something inside me ignited. I told myself ‘Enough.’ My inner child suddenly became my inner Warrior. I realized that my Wall of Resistance was merely an illusion of my own making, and to hide behind it forever was an act of cowardice. And so I started going to therapy and began facing all the darkest corners of myself, shining a light into the shadows with great reverence. Hard lines started to become soft edges, and the walls began to crumble. I stopped having to fight so hard. I began to lean in, embrace, and forgive.
Forgiving myself made space for me to begin loving myself. This love came from a warm, glowing energy inside that held me when I was scared, danced with me when I was joyful, and guided me to my inner wisdom. This was an incredible learning experience, and I am continuously learning. When something amazing happens to me, I still experience feelings of self-sabotage. I have to remind myself that I deserve to be happy, and that everything in my life is of my own creation. Affirmations have been extremely powerful for me, helping to keep me in alignment with my highest self.
What if every time you found yourself repeating a damaging belief to yourself, you consciously replaced it with a positive affirmation?
“I am powerful”
“I deserve good things”
“I am beautiful”
“I am divine”
“I am strong”
“My body is sacred”
“I am my greatest gift to myself”
“I create my own happiness”
“I am comfortable in my own skin”
“I am enough”
I know that I am not alone in these struggles. There is an epidemic of limiting beliefs amongst women. Coming together in circles, as women have done throughout time, reminds us that we are not alone. Together we can remember our sacred feminine power to help us overcome our limiting beliefs. What does sacred feminine power mean to you? What prevents you from connecting with other women? Our connection to each other has become so incredibly damaged by competition, jealously, and judgment. We must remember that our connection with each other does not hurt us but heals us, does not make us weaker but makes us stronger. Our world desperately needs us to heal our deep disconnection with ourselves and each other; the walls that separate us, the beliefs that imprison us, the limitations that keep us from our power. The change must start with us.
Bringing our unconscious beliefs into our awareness helps us overcome the limiting beliefs we hold on to. Affirmations can help bring us into alignment with our highest selves and prevent us from self-sabotaging.
We are not alone in our struggles, and coming together in circles reminds us of this. By healing our connection to ourselves and each other, we can reclaim our sacred power as women and welcome the feminine back into our world.
Photo Credit: Kenya Brading